Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” – Lao Tzu

Struggling with social anxiety? You have come to the right place then. Social anxiety is the intense fear and apprehension that you face when you are in a social situation or about to go to a social setting. Along with the apprehension you would also experience bodily discomfort like palpitations, frequent urination, stomach upset, trembling, tremors, shivers, cold feet, profuse sweating, etc.

The roots of social anxiety are sown right from your childhood when you start socializing or interact with others. The way you are brought up, the way you are treated by others, how people see you and your personality… everything has an important role to play. However, at the very core of social anxiety symptoms lies a shattered and battered sense of self or self-confidence. If you have a high level of self-confidence then probably you won’t experience social anxiety at all! But, if your confidence levels are low, then you are under social anxiety threat.

As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are – what others say is irrelevant.” – Nic Sheff

So, how to develop a good sense of self or a well-defined self-confidence? Here are some techniques to add a buffer and boost to your self-confidence levels:

Building Self-confidence

  • Do not compare yourself with others. This is the major mistake that most of the people do. Focus on your own inner self. You will find a lot of potentialities within.
  • Identify your weaknesses and shortcomings. Once you have discovered the loopholes, you can easily bridge the gaps. But, don’t be too hard on yourself. It is ok to not to be perfect. In fact, no one is perfect out here. We all are a work in progress!
  • After you have identified your weaknesses, try not to avoid them. Try to accept your weaknesses, take them as a challenge and work on alleviating them.
  • The next step is to discover your strengths and strengthen your strengths. The more you harness your strengths and virtues, the more confident you will be.
  • Believe in yourself that you can do it! Be optimistic! The more you start believing in yourself and believing in the best… you will see a new beautiful n bright “U”.
  • Accept compliments with generosity and listen to comments mindfully. If someone comments on you, try to analyze if it’s really meant for your well-being. If it’s good for you then there’s nothing bad in listing to other’s advice and working for your betterment. If it’s meant to hurt you, then put the words in one ear and flush it off from the other ear. That is the reason why you have two ears!
  • Celebrate your success no matter how big or small it is. This calls for a party!
  • Sometimes making others feel good also makes you feel good and confident. Be good and do good…that’s the best serum n syrup that would boost your confidence to unfathomable levels.

Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit” – E.E. Cummings

Best wishes,

Sareeta