This blog post is dedicated to all the aching hearts and grief-stricken minds who are struggling in the odds and evens of life. Many a times you must have got a feeling to “quit”. This quitting could be due to manifold reasons such as loss of a loved one, shattering life events, physical loss, and terminal illness and so on. The permutations and combinations in which life manifests before us sometimes leave us helpless and hopeless.
Many of you may stop the battle against life and some of you would stand up again and keep walking till you achieve your cherished goal. Amid all these, the worst victims are the ones who fall a prey to the vicissitudes of life and stop trying to make things better. It is never too late to change “impossible” into “possible” and “unable” into “able”!
Keeping this in mind, today I would like to share a true story of a youngster. This incident took place when I was in my Clinical Internship. This story reflects of how rude life can be, how devastating some situations can turn to be and how one can move out of it and live life meaningfully and fruitfully.
It was a bright Monday morning. It was full of sunshine, full of madding crowd, and full of city hustle and bustle. Like every weekday V.A (Name abbreviated) got ready for his Engineering classes. V.A was the most talented, energetic, outgoing, helping and in short an apple of the eye of his parents, teachers, peers and everybody who knew him. Life for him was a continuous celebration. No matter how painful or worse a situation was V.A used to confront it and managed it with all his might. On this fateful day, V.A had to catch a bus early as he had his extra classes. To his ill-luck a speeding bus runs over him just as he stepped out of his own college bus. The speeding bus flung him on the road with massive backbone injuries, major fractures, cuts and bruises. The road was full of blood and dread. All the people who saw V.A thought that after such a serious accident he would succumb to his injuries. But, to everyone’s surprise V.A was alive. He was in a coma for a few months and had lost all physical activities related to his lower body. Due to the severe backbone injury, V.A’s lower half of the body was completely paralyzed. A youngster who was full of life was lying lifeless on his hospital bed. When I saw him in such a devastated state I thought that this boy would go into deep depression for all that he lost.
However, this person was different and so were his fighting-back abilities. Even with a paralyzed lower body, V.A used to crack jokes, make funny faces-comments. Within a few days he became the Hero of our hospital. As a psychologist I thought maybe V.A was shrouding his painful feelings from everyone and was simply laughing out loud. In order to test this we used several psychological / formal / informal tests. Initially, yes, V.A was deeply shattered. In one of his therapy log books he wrote “Out of all the people in this world, why me???” “There are many people who do wrong and hurt others. I have never done so in my life, but still then why me???” Tears came into my eyes when I read these lines. The feeble side of my emotions also thought in the same way. However, V.A changed my entire outlook towards life.
After a couple of months of therapy, counseling, and other interventions V.A’s life jumped back to life again. The paralysis he suffered from was going to be a life long disability. But, V.A chose not to get still and stagnated due to it. While he was just to be discharged from the hospital, he said that he may not get a pretty girlfriend, people may start avoiding him or make fun of him, the society may despise him, and even the daily activities will be difficult for him. But, he was thankful that he was still alive. Maybe his limbs weren’t useful anymore, but he said that his mind and spirit was with him. He would utilize these strengths to live his life fruitfully again. Today V.A is a social worker cum Professional in a Multinational Company.
This ignited a positive spark within me. The way V.A handled his life, his loss and his determination power is an example for one and all. I want to tell everyone reading this post of mine…life was never so easy and will never be in future too. It is not a bed of roses. Each one of us has our own share of ups and downs. However, life does not end here. To fall down is not failure. Failure is in falling down and never getting up again. You may confront manifold atrocities in your life. The story of V.A teaches us that this body and situations around us are mere slaves of our mind and our outlook. If you look at your loses you will never be able to look forward and fill up your loses with new achievements. But, if you learn from your past, make peace with whatever happened and get determined to make your life worthwhile…nothing and nobody can pull you back.
The body will perish one day, but what will remain is the spirit with which you lived your life, the example that you left for others to get inspired and the faces that you made to shine with smiles. You have huge possibilities and potentialities within and around you. All the difference lies in your ability to recognize them, nourish them and utilize them to the best of your abilities. Life will show you a hundred reasons to cry, but you will have to fight back and show life that you have a million reasons to smile.
As I was looking into some of my clients’ therapy logbooks, I found out a life-changing and enlightening poem written by V.A during his hospital stay. I wanted to share with you so that you also get those positive energies, motivation and vitality to live your life to its fullest no matter what. Here it is:
Live in Full – Ecstasy……..Life
Life is a mixture of happiness and grief;
And that’s the best way to describe it in brief.
The sun, the moon, the stars, all watches your deed;
It’s upon you, whether or not, to pay heed.
Difficulties will come to make you halt;
But, for the sake of God don’t make this fault.
Be stubborn enough to go ahead and fight;
Downsize the problems, with all your might.
You make hay, when the sun shines;
And sit under it to write down some lines.
The lines showing your experience and thought;
And those big and small wars, alone you fought.
You never think what’s there for you in store;
Beware, man, it may be excitement or a big bore.
Converting boredom to joy, tough task dear;
But with the fighting spirit, there’s nothing to fear.
Bad times come and go, but they never stay;
Don’t be disgusted, keep anger at bay.
Happiness, to surround you, surely’ll take a while;
To prepare, check, retaliate and again sublime…
To everyone who just read this post: Hold on for a minute, close your eyes, take a deep breathe and make a promise that you will not let any negativity in your life to overpower you. You will live life productively and make other’s life worth living too. No matter when and what… You are the best person who can do the best justice to your life through your smile, determination, positivity, dedication, hard work, patience and perseverance.