Alan Waiczis

My primary method of helping clients improve their lives is using CBT and mindfulness to show them how to change their way of thinking. I am convinced that the thoughts precede the actions. The thoughts about self direct the feelings about self, direct the feelings and behavior about relationships and lend to the building of a life of inner peace and goals attained.
With couples, I often use these same principles to help each individual let go of destructive and resentful thinking. I also help clients find solutions to problems that have become tangled webs of defensiveness, resentment, anger and unwillingness to compromise. Sometimes the issue must be untangled bit by bit, getting the clients to back away and look at themselves and the problem as though "watching themselves" and how they have behaved toward one another, rather than each focusing on the other.
I believe I am compassionate but not easy to manipulate.
I have a lot of experience with LBGTQ individuals and couples and often work with polyamorous couples, (and "throuples" or other ingenious and imaginative ways that people find happiness). I have counseled "Master/Slave," B&D and "kink" and find that, not only can I not be shocked, but have found non-mainstream clients an opportunity to take a deep dive into humanity. I find that, not only can I not be shocked but have found non-mainstream clients an opportunity to take a deep dive into humanity.
I am a clean and sober member of Alcoholics Anonymous with 32 years clean and sober. While I seldom take clients strictly to work on their addiction issues I have a deep understanding of these issues when they arise in a relationship.