Are you in Love?

By |2018-08-30T22:24:30+00:00February 11th, 2014|Categories: Everyday tips, Mental Health, Relationships|0 Comments

Love… The word itself gives a “wow” feeling, doesn’t it? Interestingly, love is a word that is felt and understood by different individuals in different ways. Love manifests itself in manifold hues and forms. You can see love between a mother and her child, between a brother and sister, between peers, passionate lovers, husband and wife and so on. In short, love is felt in different ways and is expressed in different ways.

Let me tell you an interesting real life event in my life. I was attending a seminar on the importance of the heart in our lives. The doctor said, the heart is the most fascinating and romantic organ of the human body. When we asked why and what was the reason behind it, this was his reply: Since ages everyone implies to the heart when one speaks of love. To connote this he said, of course one cannot say that “Oh my love….my kidney loves you”, “My stomach is in love with you”, “Oh please don’t reject me…Please don’t break my liver”! Everyone in the seminar hall had a hearty laugh. So, when we talk about love, our heart has a significant role to play.

Do you know that love has a strong physiological and psychological connection? This is a simplified figure of how love is felt and our responses to its feeling:

Chemical_basis_of_love

During the early decades Clive Staples Lewis – who was a great poet, novelist, theologian and essayist of his times – differentiated love into four different categories:

Storge (Affection) Stroge is a feeling of love you feel with your family members, or people otherwise related to you.
Philia (Friendship) If you love your friend unconditionally, then you are experiencing Philia or Friendship love. It is also felt for people with common interests or activities.
Eros (Romance) This suggests the feeling of “being in love” or “loving” someone. Eros also signifies spiritual love, aesthetic love, passionate love, sexual love and so on.
Agape (Unconditional Love) If you love someone beyond the physical correlates of selfish desires, circumstances or any such boundations then you are experiencing Agape. Agape is to love someone unconditionally, the most sought after form of love.

So could you relate to what kind of love that you are in from the table mentioned above? With Valentine’s Day almost here, I can sense many hearts throbing fast. The reason being your purpose to find your beloved, to know whether you are actually in love or not, whether your love will be accepted or rejected, how will you surprise your partner on this special day….whoa whoa whoa…wait, wait! Now I will tell you a way to find out whether actually the cupid has struck you or are you simply in the mirage of infatuation. Check out the questionnaire I have mentioned below. Here we go:

  1. Do you simply like the person or are you literally crazy about the person?
  2. Would you want to devote your entire time and life for the person?
  3. Is the person the first person you remember in the morning and the last person you remember while you go into deep sleep?
  4. Do you often see the person in your dreams?
  5. Do you love the person so intensely that you can sacrifice everthing for him/her?
  6. Upto what extent can you change yourself for the person?
  7. Would you give up your important things or plans for him/her?
  8. Do you like his/her personality?
  9. Will you love him/her no matter what and no matter when?
  10. Life will decay, body will also decay. So would you love your partner even when he/she is sick, grows old and in any situation?

If you answered a Yes to most of the questions then I would say that “Hey, you are in love. You love the person totally, madly and badly. You can go to any lengths and heights to love this person. Your love won’t fade away in the ebb and flow of time and situations. If situation demands then you can easily make amends, changes or sacrifices for your beloved.” So don’t wait for anything…just find out a right way to express your love. This Valentine’s Day, give a new meaning and dimension to your love.

Where love is, heartbreak is also common. So don’t get bothered by it. Sooner or later one fine day the person who is made for you will surely step into your life and make it worth living.

Finally all I wanna say is…Love is beautiful, love is Divine, love is meanigful and love is life. Whether you love your parents, family or beloved, do not let any negativity enter into such a pure and pious emotion. Love has its own psychological benefits too. Some of them are:

  •     Confidence and self-esteem
  •     Feeling of security and compassion
  •     Sharing, nurturance and caring
  •     A sense of belongingness and we-feeling
  •     Adjustment and healthy coping mechanisms
  •     Strong sense of positivity, empathy and goodwill
  •     Overall physical and mental well-being

The psycho-physical-spiritual benefits of pure love are manifold. I can write uncountable points on it. I don’t want it to make it a strenous job for you to read such a long writing of mine. It’s just that true love multiplies your happiness and halves all the pains and sorrows. If you have already found your love, then love with all your dedication and honesty. If you are still in search of your beloved…then may you find your dream partner soon!

Lots of love-dust on you,

Sareeta

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