Whether you are into a committed relationship or you have already taken your wedding vows; whether you are a family member or a dwelling in a society filled with kith and kins…life is woven with many relationships throughout. It is something that you simply cannot avoid. But, along with the people and relationships different mindsets, experiences, different viewpoints, personalities and different thoughts-behaviors are also attached. So when a given relationship comprises of such a huge fabric of different aspects, it is bound to become stressed and stringent.
Maintaining a healthy, ideal and meaningful relationship with everyone is almost like an art. It takes a lot of empathetic understanding to make relationships bloom. Otherwise, it has to face a lot of obstacles. Do you know some of the most common obstacles to a healthy relationship? They are very common obstacles but many times they go amiss. Rarely they are identified and dealt with in our day-to-day living. The common yet big obstacles to a healthy relationship are:
1) “The Ego Clash”
This is one of the most significant challenges or obstacles in a healthy relationship. You can take this as the biggest hurdle that does not let people come close to each other or connect emotionally with each other. If you hold your ego at a higher plane than any relationship, then this is going to cause problems in your relationship. Similarly, if two persons with puffed up egos stand against each other, it is next to impossible to make that relationship function healthily. Both the person’s ego would clash like anything, there would be no room left for a peaceful negotiation. It will be always like “I will win and you will have to lose at any cost”. This same sentence would be running in the other person’s mind too.
In other words, unless and until you keep your egos issues aside and try to make peace with your relationship, it will pose as the biggest threat to that relationship. It would be very difficult to bridge the ego-gap and the emotional-connection gap.
Hence, in any kind of relationship each one should be treated as equal and equally important. A relationship is not a race of winning and losing by virtue of one’s ego. It is a mutual bond of love, affection, mutual respect and mutual trust.
2) Communication Errors
I have seen communication problems in many relationships. This is in fact, very common. If someone has a problem with his/her family member then instead of talking and clearing the issue with that member he/she goes and spreads out before others. This is a major blow to the “trust and ethical aspect” of a given relationship. This is a major blunder in communication almost everyone does.
If you have problem with someone, then in spite of sharing it with anybody else, try to talk and fix things with that person first. If everything else fails then you can take the help of others. Communication errors or lack of effective communication sometimes leads to irreparable damage to a relationship.
Therefore, if you have a problem with anyone, try to talk to him/her first. Try to resolve things between the two of you. Then, if nothing works out you can take the help/intervention of someone else. This will keep the trust in the relationship intact.
3) Undefined/Unethical Expectations
If I expect my husband to help me with my chores, I should also help him in his other activities. If I expect my sister to respect me, then I should respect her first. This is how it should go. But, sometimes situations and behaviors go other way round. And this makes a relationship run into trouble. Sometimes some people hold so high expectations that it becomes very difficult for the other person to fulfill that expectation.
A relationship is a two-way process. If you expect something from someone, you should be able to do that thing or other things for him/her too. However, if you would keep on having unethical or undefined expectations then the relationship would become hellish. Being human beings having expectations is pretty normal. What is important is up to how much extent you are yourself fulfilling expectations, or up to what extent you understand the other person too.
4) Unresolved Issues
This is also one of the major hindrances to a healthy relationship. Keeping unresolved issues is like piling up emotional magma that would blast off one day. If you have any issue or face any disturbance in a relationship, try to resolve the issue or problematic situation as soon as possible. Otherwise, this unresolved issues will lead to a pent up stack of negative emotions, hatred, negative thoughts…. that may explode off in an unprecedented manner.
So folks! Life is too short to sleep with pain and rise up with regrets. Make your relationships healthy, as they are your greatest support and strengths. If you are related to someone in any way, try to be true to that person/relationship, try to make that relationship a pure, meaningful and eternal journey beyond the limits of space and time.
“Courage means to keep working a relationship, to continue seeking solutions to difficult problems, and to stay focused during stressful periods.” – Denis Waitley